Small & Big

Castles. In the U.S., the family structure most similar to finely hewn, rock–solid castles is the McMansion. Although of monstrous proportion, McMansions are constructed to last as long as your average hamburger. With good fortune, I should be here longer than the McMansion but surely won't outlast any castle that could still be here a thousand years from now, give or take a decade. Plus, I lack colorful flags, hardy walls, hilltop outlooks, festive shadows, soldiers, and old money. Yes, Italian castles are better than me. Photo: ©2006 P.L. Frederick

The book is not an easy one to read. The subject is real, the examples are deeply difficult, but the truth in it will, as they say, set you free. You'll find yourself growing stronger and stronger with each chapter. On the very last page, at the very last period, you'll close the book and realize that you are a completely different person than the one who began it. The book is The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker. It's a book I read in 1994 only because my friend Michele gave me her copy. It's a book title, cover, and topic I would normally stay far from. But my friend is the calm and well-grounded type and had never before recommended a book to me. The offer seemed helpful, I gave it a chance, and it was. Although more than a decade has passed since I read it, some very concrete examples remain with me, including: 1) You have amazing instincts when it comes to danger. Does a stranger say "I promise" in order to get you to do something? This inappropriate use ...

That’s what the radio just told me. In the recent three years I’ve been hearing a lot on the subject. Or at least a lot of the same five words: “religious republicans and liberal democrats.” The media seem to have comfortably settled on this phrase to compare the two biggest political parties in the United States. Didn’t it used to be conservatives versus liberals? Or, heck, republicans versus democrats? Am I to infer that if a democrat visits a church/synagogue/mosque, belongs to a religion, or believes in God that she must actually a republican instead? By definition, does “liberal” exclude “religion”? Does God stand at some gigantic poll booth in the sky, voting? Therein lies my concern. Why is anyone anywhere, let alone everywhere, putting forth the impression that one U.S. political party works for God? Is this a religious war? David W. was a big help and he wasn’t even trying. I met David at church. We chatted about the u...

According to hearsay, my entrance into the world was bumpy. On the way out, and without the map, I conked my head on the tunnel wall. By the time the historical photos are taken there’s a fist-sized red lump affixed to my forehead, suitable for framing. Click. Luckily, the cold fluorescent hospital lighting enhances the birthmarks on my lip, distracting the eye from the head thing in the photo. Whoever started the rumor that babies are cute? Maybe they are, but only in 1883 illustrated soap advertisements. I went on to survive my birth. The noggin bump eventually receded but the birthmarks remain—a natural Modern Art tattoo. Those who notice the red splotches most likely assume I’ve been recently hit in the face or that a transmittable virus is involved. But it’s not my job to convince or explain to people when I don’t cover it up with lipstick. To heck with it, let people think what they will. We’re all human and our conclusions are rarely based on reality anyway. For me, it was ...

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