The More Times Change, The More They Stay The Same
Love the online version of The New York Times. Love, love, love it. However—and this has a big capital H, followed by a long pause wherein I don’t type—however, a recent mailing they sent caused me to heartedly question our future together.
First off let me share with you that I am grateful every time I peruse their online edition, and have been for more than five years. There is no paper to unfold and fold, no ink smearing my fingertips, no yellowing newsprint stored in my recycle bin, and no trudging said paper off to the Duxbury town dump. (I don’t abide calling it a “transfer station.” “Dump” gets us where we need to go 75% quicker.) Most enjoyable, though, is not having to pick through murders and robberies and other garbage to find my science and health news. Unlike the printed paper, online I see only headlines and snippets until I click a specific article that I choose to read. This makes for less junk going to my subconscious. I keep a clean mind, see.
So, I’m reading the Times’ letter containing Reasons Why You Should Subscribe To Our Exceptional Newspaper Right Now. Reason #1: Save 50%. Okay, good deal there. Reason #2: Play crossword puzzles against the clock or with a friend. Personally, we both know I’m not smart enough for a crossword puzzle, let alone one from the Big Apple City, but it’s nice when someone assumes I am. Classy move, Times. Then comes reason #3, for something called Times Reader: “A breakthrough newspaper experience that gives you the look and sections of the printed paper on your computer.” Breakthrough? Breakthrough? It’s a computer screen mimicking a newspaper layout in use for 400 years. Would I need to print it out on my home printer or hand-cranked mimeograph machine? That would be groundbreaking! Perhaps one morning, as I’m busy cranking away in the basement to make the print deadline for my Tuesday edition, I’ll notice an article about the successful invention of the perpetual motion machine. “We know it’s revolutionary,” the article will say, “because it drives like a Chevy Cavalier coupe.”
Perhaps I’m overreacting. But still, here’s my questioning: Times, will you keep the old timey version of your online newspaper available—the kind based on Ye Olde Internet? Perhaps this exposes my antiquity to you, but I’m not comfortable with upcoming technological breakthroughs, such as writing in cuneiform.
Sign up for free access to The NY Times online, while you still can.
First off let me share with you that I am grateful every time I peruse their online edition, and have been for more than five years. There is no paper to unfold and fold, no ink smearing my fingertips, no yellowing newsprint stored in my recycle bin, and no trudging said paper off to the Duxbury town dump. (I don’t abide calling it a “transfer station.” “Dump” gets us where we need to go 75% quicker.) Most enjoyable, though, is not having to pick through murders and robberies and other garbage to find my science and health news. Unlike the printed paper, online I see only headlines and snippets until I click a specific article that I choose to read. This makes for less junk going to my subconscious. I keep a clean mind, see.
So, I’m reading the Times’ letter containing Reasons Why You Should Subscribe To Our Exceptional Newspaper Right Now. Reason #1: Save 50%. Okay, good deal there. Reason #2: Play crossword puzzles against the clock or with a friend. Personally, we both know I’m not smart enough for a crossword puzzle, let alone one from the Big Apple City, but it’s nice when someone assumes I am. Classy move, Times. Then comes reason #3, for something called Times Reader: “A breakthrough newspaper experience that gives you the look and sections of the printed paper on your computer.” Breakthrough? Breakthrough? It’s a computer screen mimicking a newspaper layout in use for 400 years. Would I need to print it out on my home printer or hand-cranked mimeograph machine? That would be groundbreaking! Perhaps one morning, as I’m busy cranking away in the basement to make the print deadline for my Tuesday edition, I’ll notice an article about the successful invention of the perpetual motion machine. “We know it’s revolutionary,” the article will say, “because it drives like a Chevy Cavalier coupe.”
Perhaps I’m overreacting. But still, here’s my questioning: Times, will you keep the old timey version of your online newspaper available—the kind based on Ye Olde Internet? Perhaps this exposes my antiquity to you, but I’m not comfortable with upcoming technological breakthroughs, such as writing in cuneiform.Sign up for free access to The NY Times online, while you still can.
Comments