Have A Sound Meeting
The day job requires conference calls. This is where participants talk together on the phone and purposely say stuff like, “The combination of our BGA usage parameters and IBU cost structure co-meters create a Tier One model of achievement with global end-structure Make. implications for 1Q.” (Translation? Linguists are stumped.) The contagion of boredom bacteria* spreads like an oozing mucus of molasses slowing seeping over a Ken Burns documentary about paint drying on a humid day in the suburbs.
There are high spots though—moments that give evidence of humanity. Most participants don’t use the Mute button so the occasional oddball noise gets broadcast globally. Unless the culprit fesses up nobody knows where the sound comes from. It could be me in Boston or it could be you over there. (Was it you?) Some of the human sounds I’ve heard during big suit meetings are:
Unfortunately, the racket makes it difficult to nap.
* A virus would be too hip.
There are high spots though—moments that give evidence of humanity. Most participants don’t use the Mute button so the occasional oddball noise gets broadcast globally. Unless the culprit fesses up nobody knows where the sound comes from. It could be me in Boston or it could be you over there. (Was it you?) Some of the human sounds I’ve heard during big suit meetings are:
- Dishes being washed, dried, and stacked in a wooden cupboard
- Pitter-patter of tiny squirrel feet (or rat feet)
- Liquid pouring into a white porcelain bowl
- (Complete list here)
Unfortunately, the racket makes it difficult to nap.
* A virus would be too hip.
Comments
If only I could soar with you mighty eagles. *sigh*
Eagles? Nah, that'd be too full of life. With all the hot air we're more like dirigibles. Big, fat, helium-filled zeppelins. Come fly with us, Dave. Come fly with us.
Are you doing this deliberately?